The Lost Art of Letter Writing

When's the last time you received a letter from an old friend? I'm not talking about a friendly e-mail (which has its place, as I've said in earlier blogs) or those short thank you notes in which the sender struggles to find words beyond, "Thank you for the blender. I really needed one." I'm talking about an honest to goodness letter. Better yet, when's the last time you wrote a letter?

If you remember life before faxes, computers and cell phones, you also remember the joy of discovering a hand-written letter in your mailbox. Sometimes, I couldn't stop myself from ripping open the envelope and reading its contents on the spot. Other times, I'd set the envelope aside until I found a quiet moment in the day when I could savor the letter, like a piece of dark chocolate after dinner. I would sometimes read a juicy letter over and over until I darn near memorized the words.

I miss those letters. Excluding holiday "form" letters (which have their place, just like e-mails), it's been over a year since I've received a good, old-fashioned letter. And it's not because I don't have out-of-town friends. It's because my friends, like everyone else in this fast-paced, digitized world, don't take the time to write letters. What a loss.

Beyond the joy of sending and receiving letters, there's another pearl: When you write a letter, you have a purpose and a specific audience, so your writing is as clear and focused as it ever gets. Think back to the last letter you wrote to a friend--even if it's been a few decades. Did you struggle to find words? More likely, the process was natural, almost effortless. Although journal writing has been touted as one of the best tools to build writing fluency, I think letter writing trumps it a hundred times over.

I started my first journal as a kid, mainly because my best friend kept one. As a young adult, I started several journals, only to fall off the wagon after a few weeks. I thought I lacked self-discipline until I realized that, for me, filling blank pages with words written to no one in particular feels like a fruitless chore. Far from building writing fluency, I would stare at the blank page, clueless about what to say. In fact, the only time I've come close to writer's block is with journal writing.

But give me the audience of an old friend and suddenly I have purpose, clarity of thought and fluency to spare. A few years ago my best friend told me she'd kept all the letters I've written her in a shoe box--and we go way back. I shudder to think what I might have written 20 years ago, but I'm honored that she valued my words enough to preserve them. It's probably the best writing I've ever done. And I owe it to audience and purpose.

Don't get me wrong. If journal writing works for you, by all means, forge ahead. But if a blank page has ever left you wordless, try letter writing--called epistolary writing--instead. Not only will you find your voice and purpose, but you'll do it with panache. And the best part of all? One of these days, when you least expect it, you'll discover a return letter in your mailbox!